I've spoken about my friend before, you can read about her here and here if you want to catch up.
Since my blow up on the phone, I hadn't heard from her. I didn't really expect too, we've been in this dysfunctional cycle for years now and I've got it down pat. When I tell her something she doesn't want to hear and smacks too much of truth, I won't hear from her for months. Not until the next time she needs to vent to me.
So when I saw a message on my facebook account, I was a tad surprised to hear from her. Her message was full of anger. Misquoting our last phone conversation to the hilt. Telling me what I had said was unforgivable.
It's amazing to hear her version of the talk...because what I said and what she heard were two very different things. This has been the case for years, of course.
I knew there was no point correcting her. It would just keep the argument going and really that's what she wants/needs. She needs the drama to continue. This is how she remains the perpetual victim in her mind, I think.
I told her that I wished her well with her newly found freedom(her husband had moved out) and that she found the peace she so greatly deserved and left it at that. And I really mean that. I think after 10+ years of this, I'm done and can only wish her well as I quietly close the door on this chapter of my life.
Trust me, I knew that wouldn't be that last I heard from her but I won't bore you with the details.
After her third or fourth message(becoming increasingly more hateful) I blocked her from my account.
What surprised me was my sense of relief I felt almost immediately. I guess I hadn't realised I'd been holding in so much stress related to her situation.
I can only hope she finally gets the help she needs. Maybe one day our paths will cross and I'll see her happier.
I can hope.