Saturday, October 6, 2012

She's gone to the other side...

I've spoken about my friend before, you can read about her here and here if you want to catch up.

Since my blow up on the phone, I hadn't heard from her. I didn't really expect too, we've been in this dysfunctional cycle for years now and I've got it down pat. When I tell her something she doesn't want to hear and smacks too much of truth, I won't hear from her for months. Not until the next time she needs to vent to me.

So when I saw a message on my facebook account, I was a tad surprised to hear from her. Her message was full of anger. Misquoting our last phone conversation to the hilt. Telling me what I had said was unforgivable.
It's amazing to hear her version of the talk...because what I said and what she heard were two very different things. This has been the case for years, of course.

I knew there was no point correcting her. It would just keep the argument going and really that's what she wants/needs. She needs the drama to continue. This is how she remains the perpetual victim in her mind, I think.

I told her that I wished her well with her newly found freedom(her husband had moved out) and that she found the peace she so greatly deserved and left it at that. And I really mean that. I think after 10+ years of this, I'm done and can only wish her well as I quietly close the door on this chapter of my life.

Trust me, I knew that wouldn't be that last I heard from her but I won't bore you with the details.

After her third or fourth message(becoming increasingly more hateful) I blocked her from my account.

What surprised me was my sense of relief I felt almost immediately. I guess I hadn't realised I'd been holding in so much stress related to her situation.

I can only hope she finally gets the help she needs. Maybe one day our paths will cross and I'll see her happier.

I can hope.

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