Friday, August 17, 2012

Pleasure and Pain

Two nights ago H fisted me for the first time(is it just me who dislikes that word?). I wish there was a better term for this type of activity.
We'd tried a few times before but with varying degrees of failure. My body just wouldn't/couldn't cooperate.

If you've never had it done I'm not sure I can describe the simultaneous feeling of pleasure and pain I got from the experience. You know when someone describes pain that hurts "in a good way" it's kinda like that, but better. Much better.

I'd always been curious about fisting. One look at H's hands had kept me from asking for/attempting such a thing for many years. I also wasn't 100% sold on the whole pleasure and pain idea. Although I have a rather high tolerance for pain(suffer from chronic nerve pain due to Lyme) I don't get off on pain. Sure I like to be slapped/spanked/choked a bit but anything harder than that really isn't my thing.

With that said, I do like the "feeling of fullness" that comes from penetrative sex. Is penetrative even a word? ;)
I eventually figured that if I could pass a nearly 9 pound baby(monkey #2) thru my cooch I probably could handle H's fist.

At first H stimulated my g-spot and gave me two strong orgasms to relax and loosen me up(that's #8 & #9 N if you're reading this). Soon H was fucking me with a finger, then two fingers and so on. After awhile I wasn't entirely sure he had his whole hand up there till I checked. Sure enough I could only feel his wrist.

Here's where things get kinda fuzzy. As H started to move his fist inside me, I started to zone out. All I was...was feeling and sensation. As he used his other hand to press down on my pubic bone he gained more leverage to move his other hand. Back and forth rubbing on my g-spot and feeling of full was overwhelming. When I started to climax my muscles clamped down on his hand. We literally moved together in one movement. Two people joined together but really moving as one. The orgasm(#10) was intense and lingered long after he'd slowly removed his hand.
The feeling of fullness lasted quite awhile. I worried things wouldn't contract back down to my normal size. I know this line of thinking is silly, but it doesn't keep me from freaking out a little.

Afterwards, H held me wiping the sweat off my forehead and body. When I needed to pee he helped me walk to the bathroom and stayed to make sure I didn't hurt myself. Sometimes after intense/rough sex I have difficulty walking, talking, etc.
It took awhile before I was aware of my surroundings. I wanted to talk about the experience but I was sleepy and spent. Our talk would have to wait till the next morning.

I definitely think it's something we'll continue to explore. It was such a intimate experience, far more than I'd anticipated.

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