H and I had planned to have some hot back seat ferry sex on the way home today.
I had an early doctor appointment and then I wanted to be sure we stopped off at Trader Joe's before we caught the 2:25 ferry. Our refrigerator was pitifully empty.
H was worried our tinted windows wouldn't be enough to hide the fact that we were gonna fuck. Meh, I didn't worry so much. Most people seemed to mind their own business on the ferry.
We waited for the ferry to arrive. H was listening to a ball game and I was reading a biography on Ayn Rand. Did you know that The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged still sell over 300,000 copies every year? Jeez, I didn't. I still only have 61* readers following my blog.
The first inkling we had this wasn't gonna happen was when the ferry worker stopped us and had us park in the middle of the ferry. Usually we're always directed to the upper parking areas which are only two lanes of cars and fairly quiet.
Strike one: We're in the middle of four lanes of cars on the ferry. Crap. On every side of our car is a car parked very very close. Mere inches away really.
But H did notice most people were ditching their cars to relax inside the ferry. Okay, I thought...maybe this was still gonna happen.
Strike Two: As soon as we're out in the water the boat starts to roll. Fuck, we're in the wake of some huge container ship. As we pitch to the left, I turn green...not a good sign. I rarely get sea sick on the ferry, but it does happen every blue moon. Shit.
H notices my lovely shade of green and rolls his eyes. I figure he's picturing me puking on his dick instead of sucking on his dick. Not a pretty thought.
Strike three: Some douchebag's car alarm starts going off every 30 seconds. Soon he's at his car fumbling trying to turn it off. But now there's a crowd growing around our car. Everybody assumed it was THEIR car. Come on people!
H asked me if they had read my twitter feed announcing the up coming 'ferry sex'. "Fuck, I don't think so but I've never seen it more crowded."
"Maybe we should have them turn on a spot light and sell tickets?" I smirk.
H isn't feeling my humor. He's been waiting 3 hours for ferry sex.
Five more minutes and we'll be docking.
"Sorry honey, I'll make it up to you tonight, I promise."
Somehow this doesn't seem to placate him. I'll have to think of something good for next time.
*I do have more readers, but only 61 committed readers. Usually I blow past 60 in a day...but hey, I can't ask for a commitment from everyone.